Saturday, March 1, 2014

My daughter cheated on a test.... and I couldn't be more proud!

I know what you're thinking? and when I say it out loud it does sound ludicrous. But its the truth.

Our Abby is the brightest girl. She naturally excels at what she does with very little effort. But math is her stumbling block. Every Tuesday she shuffles into school with the doom of the weekly math quiz. Every Tuesday she gets in the car and immediately announces whether she passed or not. No matter the outcome, we exchange high fives and make our way home. This Tuesday was no different. She announced that she passed! In my book, this called for a double high five because x6s are difficult for me and I love to live vicariously through my kids! When we got home the schedule stayed right on point. Some sibling screaming, fighting, clearing out the cupboards and inhaling as many snacks as could be located. Followed by dinner, dishes, bathes, hair brushing, teeth brushing, next day clothing selection.....then cuddle time. While I was sitting on the couch next to Abby she brought up her math quiz again. "Mom, I passed my x 6 quiz." "I know sweetie! I am so proud of you." Abby responded, "Yeah, I knew I would have trouble with a few of them, so I looked at my math chart and wrote them down on the top of my paper, and before I turned in the test I erased them so Mrs. Z didn't see them."

Dear. Lord. Breathe in, breathe out. Stephanie? What are you going to say? How are you going to respond? I wanted to run. I wanted to shuffle her off to bed and pretend I didn't hear it. But there she was, yearning to spill the beans, desiring to cleanse her heart. She was listening to the God's tiny whisper telling her something just wasn't right. Don't leave her hanging. "Hmm, how do you feel about that?"

"Not really good at all mom".

Abby is very prideful. She doesn't like to admit that anything she does is wrong. And here she is admitting she cheated on a test. She could have chosen to move on. To not say a word. Nobody would have known. She wasn't caught. She simply knew what she did was wrong and she had to make it right. We made a plan. Together we would work to rectify the situation. Through tears of embarrassment, guilt, and disappointment we decided together she needed to tell her teacher. We were able to talk about how proud I was she came to me to tell me the TRUTH. How I understood why she might feel cheating would help her get ahead, but how it really only puts you so far behind. How I have never been so proud of her in her 8 years on earth. Through our tears, we prayed together. Asking God for forgiveness, asking God for strength and courage to talk to her teacher and tell her the TRUTH. Taking time to understand that we were born into this sinful word and that nobody on earth is perfect.

Because you see, we all fall short, we all sin, nobody but Jesus Christ is sinless. The reality is we were born in a sinful world. If it wasn't for Gods grace and mercy, where would we be? I shutter to think of the outcome. The difference between this 8 year old girl and so many in this world is that she is acutely aware that her truth, honesty and character matter. They matter to her, they matter to us, they matter to God.

She met with her teacher yesterday morning and told her what had happened. She told her that she had cheated on her test and she knew it was not right. She told her teacher that she would like to retake the test the right way. I am so thankful for the teachers at New Groningen. Each one of my kids teachers understands that education is important, but more importantly is the character building of children. In an email from her teacher after their talk-- "It sounds like Abby's snow day was tainted with the misery of guilt and that she has learned a huge life lesson. Thank you for how you respectfully handled this with me and Abby. You took the "high road". Not all parents support a teacher in such a way. Some choose to defend or make excuses for a child's wrong choice. I am so proud of Abby. That was a huge undertaking."

So after a weekend of hard work, heavy math fact preparation, she will retake the test. She may pass. She may not. Either way, she will get a high five, a kiss and a hug, and we will celebrate her.

Love you Abbers!

Sunday, February 16, 2014

Time to make time.

It has been several years since I made one measly post. The reason I started this was to put in writing my life so next week (yes, I will have forgotten by then) what we have accomplished, endured, forgotten, and remembered. My girls are now 8 and 5. They are amazing! I want to be able to look back on their life and remember the things they do. The funny things they say. The grey hairs they have given us. The laughter they have poured in this house. I need to make it a priority. Right now my house is a disaster. I mean like if my mother in law showed up here, she would whisk the girls away and make a call to CPS. :) Well, maybe not that bad... but borderline! Normally this would make me crazy, but I just got done playing Dance Dance Revolution with the girls, and I needed to grab a cup of coffee and let my heart rate return to a normal beat. The mess will still be there when this post is done.

Abigail Mae Habers- 8 years old
- Independent
- Smart
- Must be doing SOMETHING at all times. aka. ADHD
- Accomplishes anything she tries
- Embarrassed to show emotion
- Loves school
- Loves to read her bible and do BSF lessons
- Understands tough life lessons
- Loves to cuddle with us any chance she gets. I mean a few years from now I will be heart broken when she doesn't want me to lie in bed with her each night
- She is not fussy about what she wears. If it matches, she's on it.
- Incredibly responsible with her baby cousins. She is a good baby sitter!
- So competitive. Doesn't like to lose. Especially to her mom at dance dance revolution.
- Loves to watch shows with Ryan like North woods law, Turtle Man, Gator Boys
- Has so many friends and always has a kind word to say about each of them.
- Loves to learn and try new things.
- Sorting things makes her happy. Drawers, clothes, rubber bands from her loom kit.
- Loves PBJ one day and hates it the next.
- Wants to be a teacher when she grows up.
- Very good at card tricks. Really. she is.
- Loves animals especially her dogs.
- Takes the big sister role very seriously. She watches over Lily at school, but Lily better not try to hug her.... that would be embarrassing.
- Loves making lists.
- Doesn't like circus peanuts or candy hearts. WHAT?!?
- Wants to grow her hair longer, but doesn't want to brush it.
- Strongly prefers not be told no.

Lily Grace Habers- 5 Years Old
- Sweet
- Cares about everyone
- Especially cares for the unlovable. There is a boy at school that is always in trouble. Each day she celebrates when he is on "green" or when he makes good decisions.
- She loves to make cards, pictures, stuff envelopes, cut paper, plaster things with stickers
- Loves to be home, putzing with dress up clothes, babies, playing on her tablet.
- extremely imaginative.
- Has a great singing voice and often turns everything into song.
- Very opinionated on her clothing choices. This will make me too hot, the sleeves are too wide, the neck is too wide, the jeans are too skinny.
- Burps like a teenage boy.
- Sentimental about family trips.
- Not a morning person. At. All!
- Doesn't appreciate healthy food.
- School is for social time. Not necessarily learning.
- Wants to be a mommy of 4 girls when she grows up. Boys "toot" too much.
- Not a risk taker. If it aint broke, don't fix it.
- Her cousin Kyla is her best friend
- She is a hoarer and saves everything. Everything has meaning and reminds her of something. :)
- She is very messy and she's ok with that.
- Witty and funny. One day while the girls were doing their nails, Lily bent over in front of Abby and asked her to pull out her wedgie. HA!
- She cannot sit at the table while eating dinner. She would rather stand, sit, walk around, stand, twirl, sing, burp, sing, twirl, burp.
- Her dad is the man. Nobody else compares.
- She loves planning surprises for others, but gets so excited she cannot keep them a secret.
- Doesn't like winter and cannot wait to ditch her "puffy" coat and slip on her flip flops.
- Digs her heals in when trying new things but once she tries them she is so happy she did.

Love you girls more than I can explain. You are such a blessing to our family. I thank God for your individuality. I am so blessed God chose me to be your mom. Love you to the moon and back.